8 months ago I wrote this article and put it up on facebook just to sit there. Since then I have had so man comments on it that I thought I would reprint it on to the showasepdx site.

This journal entry came from me wanting to share with others that even though it seems like very tough times at our current point in history, there is always a ray of light here for us to see that the sun is really shining behind those dark dreary clouds.

It was not until recently I realized that ..hey… I could keep complaining about the clouds and the gray and the constant rain Portlander’s you know what I mean!  or I could embrace it and see what all that beautiful rain does for us on the positive side.

It is in that spirit that I share with you my heart and mind on the very important subject of Accepting Your Self and Accepting Life as it is while allowing the things your desire to align with you.

Journal Entry September 17th 2010

The past 3 years of my life have been the most difficult times I have ever gone through. Not only did my life I had been living for 15 years  come to a screeching halt but I lost everything and I mean everything I had before.  I left my home, my business, my relationship and all because of one thing, I was afraid to be WHO I AM.

I have seen so many of my fiends and family suffer at that one challenge called the TEST of Being who you really are.

Imagine if you could be all your Heart desires to be.That means your Heart not your ego or fear or things of that nature but YOUR HEART.

When you were a child you laughed, you played, you trusted and enjoyed being thrown up in the air and …well being LOVED and loving those who LOVED you.

Then…. unconscious adults and patterns of behaving from other children caused you to slowly close off to those emotions in an effort to protect yourself. And slowly you began to become another person.. or a person made up of your parents ideas, your brothers and sisters thoughts, your friends , authority figures and your religious view of who you are in the face of their Ideas about God and how YOU should behave, relate and act towards these ideas and concepts.

Soon your working in the ” Real ” World and you are working for that dollar. Working to create ” Happiness”

Then you realize your not happy and you seek out more of the old ideas you were taught to help you get ” Back into Shape” so as to not to seem so lazy or weird . ” Conform I  will ”  you say in your mind ” If I do not  I will die ?” or so you FEAR this will happen.

Years later you find yourself still unhappy but because you want to make others happy and you also do not want to make any changes that could lead to your demise.. you move from one addiction to another.

You work really hard, or party really hard, drink and use drugs or you go to the other Polarity of being a GOOD BOY OR GOOD GIRL. You immerse yourself into rituals or religious study to rid your self of this desire to be more than you are so that you can become pure, whole, clean. You will do anything to rid yourself from shame and this guilt you carry.

Then you  come to your breaking point. Something happens that gives you a choice-either Run from this feeling into the Abyss of Hopelessness and give up the dreams in your heart ( although you think it is just crazy feelings and thoughts that can not be realized) or …  Face this Feeling and Accept it and Accept what is inside of you THE REAL YOU.

All people have chosen one or the other of these Choice Points.

The ones who choose to answer the call from within them to be who they really are which is- Gentle, Kind, Loving, Giving, Caring, these Beings begin to shine and heal and do great things.

Sure it hurts as you are opening yourself up to a world you long had forgotten, a world that most people call crazy or weird or childish.  It is the world you left behind you when you began to conform to the thoughts and beliefs of those around you instead of following what you Knew was in your HEART. You Knew this a long time ago . You came here to do and be great things whether it be the most wonderful parent you could be or a great Inventor who helps change the course of the planet by his or her creativity.  We are all here to be the Greatest BEING we can be. And that Being is WHO you are and  is Who I AM.

I will share something from a book I have had the pleasure of reading  that is helping me through my journey of being Who I AM.

Take a listen:

” Rumi tells us that moment we accept what troubles we’ve been given, the door will open. Sounds easy. sounds attractive, but it is difficult , and most of us pound on the door to freedom and happiness with every manipulative ploy save the one that actually works. If your interested in opening the door to the heavens, start with the door to your OWN SECRET LIFE. See what happens when you offer to another a glimpse ofWHO YOU REALLY ARE. Start Slowly. Without getting dramatic, share the simple dignity of yourself in each moment-your triumphs and your failures, your satisfaction and your sorrow. Face your embarrassment at being human, and you’ll uncover a deep well of passion and compassion. It’s a great power, your Open Secret. When your heart is undefended, you make it safe for whomever you meet to put down his burden of hiding, and then you both can walk through the open door.”

Broken Open by Elizabeth Lesser

So today I say to all those  I love which is all peoples all those in this life.

Remember who you are.

Remember that Light that shined so bright in you when others looked upon you with great love  and adoration as you lay in their arms as a child.

Remember the joy you felt at dreaming up new and creative ways to see the world.

Remember that you are not only Loved but YOU ARE LOVE.

Remember this.

With Much Love and Gratitude

Michkael

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